One Life To Live
by Eggbert
Summary: These are troubled times for Harry and he thinks a little loving may be a dangerous thing. *Warning-slash*


ONE LIFE TO LIVE.  
  
Summary: Harry's holding off telling Ron exactly what he wants. Just in case.  
  
Rating: R  
  
Spoilers: For the books, but tiny ones only.  
  
Disclaimer: They're not mine. If they were Book 5 would be out already and this kind of thing would be canon.  
  
A/N: As it's the middle of summer, naturally I would write a fic set just before Christmas. Go figure.  
  
Warning: Harry and Ron are a couple in this fic. And they will make love, albeit in a non-graphic way. If this troubles you, leave. Don't waste my time or yours.  
  
Dedication: To Caroline who really should be renamed Eggbert's Muse.  
  
  
  
It was the Saturday before Christmas and Ron awoke early, full of anticipation, eagerly looking forward to the day ahead. The three of them would spend the day in Hogsmeade and, with any luck, Ron would be able to entice Harry away from Hermione so that he could have some time alone with the boy he loved.  
  
But the best-laid plans always seem to go astray. At breakfast Hermione was paper-white with the exception of an extremely red nose.   
  
" I've got a cold. " she said thickly. " But don't let that stop you two going. "  
  
" Okay. " smiled Harry. " D'you want us to bring you anything back? "  
  
Hermione merely smiled and shook her head.  
  
After lunch Harry and Ron set out from the castle. To Ron's delight the leaden grey sky had erupted into a continuous fall of thick white snowflakes which gave no sign of letting up.  
  
" Just as well we brought out scarves and gloves. " Harry mused. " Or we'd end up as red-nosed as Hermione. "  
  
" Yeah. This snow means business. " replied Ron.  
  
They went to the Three Broomsticks for a few mugs of Butterbeer, not saying much, merely content to be in each other's company. They were alone at the table and Ron grinned as he felt Harry's hand steal into his. He squeezed it tightly, feeling his pulse quicken in his chest.   
  
" I'll go for some more Butterbeer shall I? " said Ron noticing their mugs were empty.  
  
" Hurry back. " said Harry softly, smiling.  
  
There was quite a queue at the bar and by the time Ron returned to the table Harry had his nose buried in that day's edition of the Daily Prophet.  
  
" Where did you get that? " Ron asked curiously. He and Hermione tried to keep the increasingly grim news of the war as far away from Harry as possible, knowing he blamed himself for Voldemort's resurrection and for the ever-increasing death toll. They saw no reason at all to add to his already heavy burden.  
  
" Malfoy." Harry replied. Ron swore loudly but it didn't help. All the colour had drained from Harry's face and his hands trembled as he reached for the fresh mug that Ron had brought back.   
  
" Stop trying to treat me like the village idiot, Ron. " said Harry fiercely. " I need to know what's going on. Do you know how many Muggles he and his trained monkeys killed last week? Over a hundred. They're blaming it on a rail crash. But who managed to fuck up the track, eh? "  
  
Harry's voice had become louder and louder and others were turning to look at him. Malfoy looked particularly smug. Noting the fact and swearing to himself to make Ferret Boy pay for this one, Ron ushered Harry out of the pub and into the snowy street.  
  
" Why did you do that? " asked Harry angrily.  
  
" Because you were making an idiot of yourself. " replied Ron calmly; relaxing slightly as all the fight went out of Harry.  
  
" Yes. I know. " sighed Harry. " Sorry, love. "  
  
" Let's go for a walk. " suggested Ron and Harry concurred. Hand in hand they wandered, not watching where their feet led until they found themselves outside the Shrieking Shack.  
  
The snow had turned it into something off a Christmas card. It appeared to be dusted with icing sugar; no hint of the awful pain and suffering its silent walls had contained.  
  
" I wonder where Professor Lupin is now? " said Harry, echoing Ron's thoughts.  
  
" I dunno. " admitted Ron " But he'll have Sirius with him at any rate. "  
  
Harry smiled faintly. His godfather's loving relationship with their old teacher had delighted him but not surprised him in the least.   
  
" He's a lucky man. " said Harry wistfully.   
  
" And so am I. " said Ron, sliding his arms round Harry's waist and pulling him close. " I've got you..." And he lowered his head to kiss him.  
  
He was astounded when Harry averted his face so Ron's lips barely grazed his cheek.  
  
" What's the matter? " Ron demanded. Harry wouldn't look at him.  
  
Ron's heart sank. Was this the end for them then?  
  
" Harry? "  
  
Harry raised his head and Ron was astounded to see those emerald eyes filled with unshed tears.  
  
" I'm scared, Ron. " he said in barely more than a whisper. " Scared for you. You know how much I love you, don't you? "  
  
Ron nodded, not daring to interrupt.  
  
" That's why I'm so frightened. Everyone who has ever loved me has had something bad happen to them. If anything happened to you I couldn't bear it. Maybe we shouldn't be like this any more. Maybe you should find someone else. Someone less dangerous to love you. "  
  
Ron bit his lip. He knew meaningless platitudes would be of no use here and now. The words he spoke would have to come from the heart.  
  
" I love you, Harry. " he said solemnly. " I think I've always loved you. I don't want anyone else, no matter what you tell me. I will be with you, beside you through whatever life throws at us, if that's where you want me to be. And if anything does happen to me, it doesn't matter. I would rather have loved you like this, no matter how dangerous you might think it is, for however long we have together, than to have lived a long and productive life and never have known you at all. "  
  
The tears were streaming in earnest down Harry's face now.  
  
" You understand. " said Harry tearfully. " I had to try. "  
  
" Come here. " said Ron softly. He wrapped his cloak tightly round them both and pulled Harry even closer to him.  
  
This time there was no hesitation in Harry's response to Ron's kisses as they stood there in the tenderest of embraces, their hands moving slowly over each other as they continued to kiss, their tongues entwining with the other evoking a greater sense of arousal and desire. They broke for air but did not move apart. Harry could feel Ron's persistent arousal pressing against his own belly and he was in no better state.  
  
" Let's go back to the castle. " he said breathlessly. " The dormitory should be empty. " And he placed a firm hand on Ron's groin so he could be in no doubt of Harry's intentions.  
  
"Are you sure? " asked Ron solemnly. " I thought we were going to wait a while? "  
  
" I don't want to wait any more. " said Harry. " Anything could happen and I want us to have known what it was like to make love. Unless you'd rather not? "  
  
Ron's reply was a mere growl as they left the Shrieking Shack and made a hasty return to Hogwarts.  
  
The common room was empty as Harry laughingly dragged Ron up the spiral staircase to the dormitories.  
  
Their luck held, the dorm was also empty and within seconds they had helped each other strip off their soaking cloaks and robes and were cuddled together under the blankets of Ron's bed.  
  
Harry quickly warmed but realised Ron was still trembling.  
  
" What's up? Having second thoughts? " he enquired.  
  
" No chance. " replied Ron. " I've wanted this for such a long time and now, well, I keep wanting to pinch myself. "  
  
Harry smiled. " I can think of better ways to convince you you're awake, " he said.  
  
It was the most beautiful experience of Harry's life. He had not believed such pleasure could be possible between two people but he had reckoned without Ron.   
  
Ron was loving and gentle and ensured Harry's pleasure before his own, all the time holding him, kissing him, whispering words of love and affection until his own climax momentarily silenced him.  
  
It should have been awkward, it should have been messy and painful but it was none of these things. It was a perfect moment in time and it bound them forever.   
  
I love you, thought Harry sleepily. I must have been mad to ask you to go. And he drifted off, content in Ron's embrace.  
  
Hours later, Neville went up to the dormitory for his Potions book. The essay for Professor Snape was due in on Monday and he wasn't likely to accept Neville's excuses. Anyway, Neville reasoned, Harry and Ron were in there. Maybe they could help.  
  
His friendly greeting died on his lips as he pushed open the dormitory door and looked towards Ron's bed.  
  
They were there, all right. Sound asleep and as naked as the day they were born. The air was filled with the smell of sex but the way Ron was holding his lover, the beautiful expression on his face and the way Harry had relaxed into Ron's protective embrace chased away any feelings of embarrassment or lewdness.  
  
Neville quietly picked up his book and closed the door behind him. By the time he reached the common room he was smiling.  
  
The End. 


End file.
